let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
