does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
