Do you still have your period?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
