How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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