pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
we made out on top of his cat.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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