i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize