You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
