Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Randomize