just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
