so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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