I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
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