butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
