Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
