You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
no you cant smoke seaweed
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
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