you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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