I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
the night ended with taco bell and tears
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
