put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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