i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
