you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Text me some of your sweat
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize