Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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