Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize