dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
