i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Quick, to the slutcave!
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
