you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
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