In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
