i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
