you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
