Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
The best revenge is premature balding
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
She even gives head with a lisp.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
