How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Randomize