Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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