Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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