so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize