I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
