No stitches, just platelets and will power
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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