We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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