she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
