I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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