I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize