Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
