There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I have fence marks all over my body
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
