my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
