I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
