Your tits are I can't wait for
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
