I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
MIDGETS
????
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
