Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
