I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I can't put those talents on a resume
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
