Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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