bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
