I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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