Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass