I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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