This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
