East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
